Winter In Denial

There are so many things I should be doing nowadays. I have lots of “shoulds”. But instead, I feel kind of like this:

I should be exercising. I should be doing dishes and laundry. I should be posting and writing. I should be doing work.

Instead, what am I doing? I’m sitting with a cat on the sofa watching costume dramas.

Last night it was The Paradise. Tonight I am parked on the sofa watching The Hour. And I have yet to catch the last episode of Downton Abbey for the season, but I will. OH YES I WILL. And I have to say, I am pretty unapologetic about it.

I’m in denial about the approach of winter. I get a bit of the “just forget about it and it will go away” when it comes to the cold. Something about it makes me just want to sleep, like a bear — or, at least, the lethargic and lazy human equivalent. With more electronics. And regular showers.

The cold has come outside, and I am feeling like hibernating. It’s cold in the house, and I want to curl up under a blanket on the sofa with my knitting and a cup of tea. Or maybe a book. And remain there until, say, March.

I don’t like the cold weather. And I am tired. I am feeling as though I cannot possibly ever get enough sleep — although I must admit, I believe I am getting better quality sleep at some points of my nights these days. Certainly in the morning I’m sleeping like the dead, and quite honestly finding it harder to get up. I put that down to exercise. Which I am also blaming for the tiredness and not wanting to get off the sofa.

It’s not all exercise’s fault, mind — something about the cold makes me want to withdraw and pursue warmer and more homey pursuits. And the increasingly dark days don’t help matters much. Some days we get sun, like today, but for the most part November is dark and cold and overcast. Not conducive to activity, at least not for me.

As a kid, I would sit and read for hours through the winter months. When BDH and I were first together, we’d spend our entire Xmas holidays in the dark, watching endless movies and series — the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy extended versions, every Hornblower movie, the entire Colin Firth Pride and Prejudice, all our favourite TV series — and turned into mushrooms for awhile.

And recently, it’s been period pieces, costume dramas. Something about watching people in another era transports me from the cold for awhile. It’s escapist fare, and I love it.

But now, in Life With Kid, it’s a matter of striking a balance. Stinkerbelle makes me get out and do things, because she gets out and does things. And I feel obligated to do more and be better for her sake. And I do try. And I will continue to try. I’ll try to get back on the exercise wagon. I’ll do holiday baking and keep working on posting frequently. Perhaps I will even take up cross country skiing or something like that.

But certainly not today. And tomorrow is not looking good either. And any fits of activity are definitely going to be interspersed with long, warm, relaxing times curled up with my kid and a cat or two, some knitting or a book.

And definitely my fair share of costume dramas.

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