FAIL Friday

Having a bad week? Never fear, you’re not as big a weenie as I am.

  • Efficiency FAIL #1: So, it’s my job to do the majority of the meal planning and grocery shopping for the denizens of the House of Peevish. I try to do it within a (reasonable) budget, without being repetitive in meals, and choosing some healthy options. I have a list program on the computers in the house that I use to add items that we’re low on when I find them in the cupboards, and once a week I sit down and meal plan and fill in the list. And then, off I go. So, this week, I had only a smallish list, because for weeks I had been planning a couple of meals that, for whatever reasons, got bumped off the meal plan that week and onto the next week’s plan. One of those things was beef barley soup for Tuesday night’s supper. So on Tuesday I thought “Well, I’ll go out right quick this morning and get a few of these things, and then all I have to do later in the week is run in for whatever we need for the weekend.” So Stinkerbelle and I went out, and meandered through the store where she did the usual meet-and-greet of Her Public, bought some of the random things on our little list, and came back home. However, as we unpacked groceries, I found something was missing. The part of the list that said “buy blue cheese dressing  and veggies so we can have veggies and dip with our soup”? Yeah, forgot the dip. OH I BOUGHT VEGGIES ALL RIGHT, so forgetting dip took special talent. Oh well, I thought, we can have soup and some bread for dinner. We spent the rest of the day doing bike riding and napping and working and whatever, and then it was time to go make supper. I started making our beef barley soup, only to find WE HAD NO BARLEY. So, dinner FAIL, on several fronts. But no matter, I said, I’ll go out tomorrow and pick it up and whatever else is missing. So, Wednesday morning when That Girl was in school, I went out AGAIN, and made sure to get dressing, and barley, and the few remaining things on my list that I needed for the weekend, and came home. It was only when I went to make a sandwich for That Girl for lunch that I found WE WERE OUT OF BREAD.
  • General Common Sense FAIL: I have a sleep disorder. Everyone knows this. I have sleep apnea, combined with a genetic blessing of the shape of my face and the propensity to snore and probably a deviated septum which means I am sleep-deprived and tired ALL THE DAMN TIME. But I’ve been doing my best to get the proper amount of sleep, and I have a CPaP machine, and I get through my days with the aid of enough caffeinated beverages to float a battleship. Except today, waking up was rough, because Stinkerbelle woke up a couple of times with bad dreams, so that meant my sleep was interrupted a couple of times by getting up to comfort her (or, full disclosure, to stand weaving and stupid in a haze of sleep and trying not to fall down in the doorway while BDH did the comforting). And so, after a walk in the woods this morning, as I sat at lunch and tried not to fall face first asleep in my plate of leftover Szechuan food, BDH suggested that I should maybe have a nap when Stinkerbelle went down for hers. Now, as a person with broken sleep, I CANNOT NAP. I KNOW this. If I lie down to sleep, I need to SLEEP EIGHT HOURS AT LEAST. And also, if I lie down after I have eaten, I will wake up feeling really, REALLY ill. And yet, what did I do with a full belly at around 12:45 today? YES YOU KNOW IT, I NAPPED. And I slept like THE DEAD for about three hours, waking very reluctantly and with a nausea that could debilitate the Prussian Army. And now, I sit here nauseated and with my eyes crossing from exhaustion trying to type my regret. (The management cannot be held responsible for any typos in this missive.)
  • Planning FAIL: I like shopping in advance of events. I buy Christmas presents in January and February if there’s a sale on, and they wait in the cupboard until December. I bought birthday presents for Stinkerbelle’s third birthday a week after her second birthday. I LIKE TO BE PREPARED. Also, I don’t like to rush around, and Teh Internets Shopping  means I NEVER HAVE TO LEAVE MY HOUSE OH JOY! Plus I am cheap and I like to buy things on sale. So in book sales and Christmas shopping and whatnot for That Girl over the past eight months or so, we had way too much stuff, so I said OH DON’T WORRY I’LL PUT THAT ASIDE FOR HER BIRTHDAY. Which, you will note, is coming up NEXT WEEK. So today, we took stock of what we have for her birthday. And I was shocked to learn that the sum total of what we have is FOUR BOOKS. Here I thought we had jammies, and toys, and books… and we have four books. FOUR. So, looks like there will be some serious rushing around, OUT IN THE WORLD AMONG PEOPLE, in the next few days to pick up a game or a toy or something fun for her, as well as probably some clothes. PAYING FULL PRICE, I might add. Did I mention there would also be RUSHING AROUND. Le sigh. Do not even ASK me about birthday cake.
  • Efficiency FAIL the Second: I made a tasty delicious meal of healthy goodness in the crock pot. It was warm and delicious and so good for us. Here’s the thing, though — it was OATMEAL. I spent the time and EIGHT HOURS OF ENERGY WHICH COSTS I DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH to make a meal that I could have made on the stovetop in a fraction of the time, or almost instantly in the microwave. (To be fair, I used steel cut oats which DO take time to cook, and the house smelled FANTASTIC when we woke up this morning, because I cooked it overnight when we were sleeping so it would be ready when we woke up. And we have time-of-use billing so electricity is cheaper at nighttime here than in the daytime. But mostly it was TASTY AND DELICIOUS. I APOLOGIZE TO NO ONE.)

One thought on “FAIL Friday

  1. Oh, I have problem #1 all the time. Like the curried-consomme-soup with no curry powder incident. And I too had an unfortunate barley shortage a few weeks ago – which made the barley pilaf a little unusual.

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