I was all set today to write a really personal, emotional, from-the-heart post. Personal enough that I was even going to password protect it. Because I was feeling that way — emotional, a little raw, and needing to get it out.
The Internets, they can be full of interesting information. A fair amount of what you find is pure unadulterated shite, but there are some places you can go and find fun, and fascinating information, and learn a thing or two. But the other side of the coin is that for all the positive you find, there is information that can just bring you down, or fill you with negative, or get to you in some way.
I spend a lot of time on the internet. I like to see it as a great big library full of facts and information. (Well, a library with a coffeeshop in the lobby. And a dance bar next door.) So I read a lot, and I click around a lot, and visit a lot of sites.
But lately, I am finding a lot of stuff has been pretty negative. Not necessarily in an aggressive or confrontational way — I ignore a lot of that stuff, because the Interwebs are also full of trolls — but more in a “this is a downer” sort of way. Sometimes, news becomes too much for me to handle, with all its political issues and news of violence and natural disasters. I find it hard to process so much unhappy news in the world. I begin to fret about stuff, things like the news of (admittedly, very rare) violent crime in my city, or individual news stories about children or dogs I have never met. It gets to me.
And seeing news of friends who are struggling is hard, too. It hurts my heart to not be able to do anything to help, to just sit and be a witness to their struggles. Even news of people I don’t know, except through the tenuous electronic connection of recognizing a username or an avatar and “conversing” with them from time to time.
So with all of these deep and profound brain things happening inside my head (Heh. Julian!), I have read some articles and discussions and comments in my travels round the Internets this week that are hitting close to home. And it all just became too much to process. Hence my feeling like I needed to just sit down and write an emotionally charged, personal post.
But I didn’t. One of the interesting things we learned in our preparation to adopt was the concept of “personal” vs “private”. Personal things may be very close to your heart, but there are times when it is appropriate to share them. But private things are, well, PRIVATE, and should be shared only with due consideration. And certainly not in the internet.
I have no problem sharing personal information. Good doG, I’ve been sharing parenting fails and angst and gynecological misadventures for years now. But I rarely venture into the realm of what is private. And I decided that my feelings, or rather, where they came from this morning, were more “private” than “personal”.
So here we are. Me. Not sharing. Sorry, man. You’ve read this far, and just… NUTHIN’.
But it also makes me aware that maybe it’s one of those times to step away from the computer and the news and the forums and the swirling vortex of information for a little while. Periodically I feel the need to disconnect, and this is one of those times. Of course, my need to KNOW! STUFF! often outweighs my need to just get my Zen back, and I just don’t.
So we’ll see. I blame a lot of my mood on being cooped up and needing winter to just be OMG OVER ALREADY. Some of it is being tired and unfit and injured. And part of it is probably hormones, too. But regardless, a little unplugged time is never a bad thing. Stop clicking, shut down, walk away.
For a little while anyway.