Confession Friday

Welcome to Friday. Around here it is a long weekend, since the BigDamnHero took the day off to spend with us. So it kind of feels like a Saturday. I almost forgot it was confession day.

But I didn’t! So, I confess:

• …that I have been really depressed about my health issues this week: injuries, weight, sleep, eczema… I think the lack of sleep over the last couple of weeks has really been screwing with my head. I hope that my outlook will improve once I get these joints on the mend and get back to a normal night’s sleep.
• …that I have not been to see a health practitioner for myself in three years, since before Stinkerbelle came home. A combination of having nobody to take Stinkerbelle during a weekday for a few hours, not being in a position to take advantage of too much time off at BDH’s office, and an incompetent, disorganized family doctor have made it virtually impossible to take care of my health needs. (Except I do get to my dentist regularly, who is right down the street from BDH’s office, so Daddy and Stinkerbelle can have lunch dates while I get my teeth done.) Besides all this, I am very good at just pushing my needs down and rationalizing them away in favour of others.
• …that I have a very considerate husband, who took the day off today because he will be away tomorrow and wanted to give me a day off. So he has been cleaning all morning, and has been cooking meals for us, and he let me sleep in this morning as long as I wanted to.
• …that my blog broke our server this week. But once again, BDH came to the rescue, and fixed things up quick smart. He’s a whiz. But I think the time is coming when I have to move this blog off-site so we can have fewer technical issues to deal with. At least, until we can afford some new, better hardware. (Which, let’s face it, will never happen.)
• …that I am disappointed that, once again, the 10-15 cm of snow we were promised today did not materialize. I was kind of looking forward to being “snowed in” for the weekend. I like having an excuse to stay indoors, warm, with tea and my knitting.
• …that my daughter has discovered a love of Mika during the past couple of weeks, and we are enjoying many dance parties of Mika tunes in the course of the week. I am not a modern pop music fan by any stretch, but I think he’s pretty good. And I am trying to keep my music snobbery in check a little bit so Stinkerbelle can express her own tastes that way. A LITTLE BIT. I mean, WE MUST HAVE STANDARDS.
• …that if I go to a website or a blog that has a thing that automatically starts playing music or video, I will not go there again. I don’t care what the organization or person has to say — if they push their video or musical tastes on me as soon as I click on their site, I’m leaving. Especially when I am taking advantage of some free time while my daughter is sleeping, and suddenly music starts blasting out of my speakers because someone else thinks it’s a good song? SO NOT COOL.
• …that my daughter and I made cookies together yesterday, but I will not offer them to anyone but immediate family. And that is because, while we were spooning them out onto the pan for baking, I let Stinkerbelle hold a little teaspoon while I did the actual drop cookies with a proper spoon — and when I looked over, she was repeatedly dunking her spoon into the dough and licking it off the spoon. “Mmmm… deeYISHus, Mommy!!” So, that extra little bit of “seasoning” means those cookies stay in the family.
• …that I am actually ENJOYING the next book we have to read for our Book Club. It’s called “Three Cups of Tea” and it’s non-fiction, so YAY. But in an ironic twist, I do not know if I will be able to attend the next book club meeting to discuss it, because it may conflict with BDH’s soccer playoff schedule.
• …that I cried when I read Tova‘s news that she finally got her referral. And then I cried even more when I saw pictures of one of the most beautiful little girls on the face of this earth… her new daughter.