Mar
5
It seems some weeks that parenting a toddler is just an endless series of battles. Some you win, and some you lose.
Often times they are battles of will. Toddlers are learning to express themselves, and in so doing you get their exhortations and demands for what they want. Lately around here we are teaching “please”. Stinkerbelle has become quite vocal in expressing what she wants, usually by repeating “More! More! More!” at a very high volume and signing it like mad. She will repeat it with escalating urgency and volume until you acknowledge her. She knows how to say please, and has done for a year or so, thanks to sign language. But she is learning, as we often shush her and tell her to do, that saying “please” will get things done MUCH faster. She seems to think this is good. This is a battle we are winning. And everybody is happy.
One we are sort of holding our ground on is a battle over eating. That Baby STILL has issues with textures and chewing, and so we’re still feeding her the mushy stuff. (Hey, you find yourself waking up one day with a mouth FULL of teeth, and tell me how you get on.) But she is learning to crunch and tear and chew, which is great progress. She still hasn’t figured out that if she just keeps it in her mouth and swallows… VOILA! Eating! But that will come. On the losing front, though, is that she has a remarkable capacity for holding a mouthful of food in her mouth. She can talk and sing and breathe around this mouthful FOR. FREAKING. EVER. And it drives me to distraction. Mealtimes, consequently, can take an hour or more. We win some food battles, and we lose some. But in the end, the whole eating thing will work out just fine, so it’s best not to stress it.
A battle that we are losing is the naptime battle. That Baby still does not nap longer than 45 minutes most days, after many, many months of a good 2-hour nap in the afternoons. (Except today. 2 hours! I am SO happy!) She’s going on fumes some days, she is so tired, but since the start of February her napping has been all off. And it’s making me not a nice person. I am not having my best mommy days when that child wakes, inconsolable, after 45 minutes — and to be honest, they’re not her best days either. I am NOT willing to just surrender napping. She is too young. So we will just have to keep working on it. Warmer weather will help, because as it gets warmer, we can go outside and she will be able to run and play and tire herself out before naptime rolls around.
Other battles are just disappearing of their own accord, which is nice. We will not have a battle over weaning from a bottle, because That Baby is cool with sippies and cups — but it won’t be an issue until we figure out the eating thing and I can be sure she’s full throughout the day. We also are finding we are able to go back to the grocery store with the crazy checkout ladies because now that Stinkerbelle is older, heavier and less snuggleable and less baby-like, they seem less interested in carrying her off. The main culprits can’t even remember her name, which is most excellent news. And the ones who are respectful of not freaking her mom out are still loving up That Baby while leaving her in her stroller or shopping cart, which I wholeheartedly endorse. And a lot of battles, over getting out of the stroller and walking, or wanting to go on the swings or whatever, are going by the wayside because Stinkerbelle’s comprehension of what we’re saying is increasing by leaps and bounds, so all we have to do is talk to her and she understands and is fine with it. I know that won’t always be the way, but being able to communicate, rather than being frustrated, is something we both are enjoying.
As That Baby grows, into the Terrible Twos and Tumultuous Threes, we’re soon going to learn how to pick our battles and learn some ways to cope with the tantrums and willfulness and needs for independence. They’re going to be battles of a different sort, I am sure, and some will be won and some lost. But right now at least, we’re winning enough on each side that both parties are happy most of the time, and so hopefully we’ll remember that as we carry on.
