I’ve been feeling in a bit of a funk recently.
Sometimes I find that things weigh on my mind, making it difficult to sleep, or affecting my mood, or making me feel weary or cranky or whatever. It happens. It’s a part of the ebb and flow of life.
But still, it’s challenging.
It’s been rainy and cold for a few days, and that’s a big part of it. I hadn’t realized how important our daily walks had become until Stinkerbelle and I were a bit housebound and couldn’t get out and get some fresh air, exercise and sunshine. We are both kind of crabby and tired, so to see the sun this morning was really nice. We’re getting out for a walk this afternoon, and I don’t care where we go. We’re just packing up the water bottles and the sunscreen and hitting the sidewalks, man. I need the exercise, and we both need a change of scenery.
But to be completely honest, we haven’t been totally housebound these last few days, now that we mortgaged a cat for the money and managed to get my car repaired. Now, I know people think I was a bit silly waiting since January to get my car fixed. But EEK. New brake lines and fuel lines and a tune up and a few other odds and ends ran us over $1500, and that’s money we just didn’t have on one income. (Not to mention, it’s almost what a 12-year old car is WORTH, for the love of crap.) So now we have freedom, and we are able to drive wherever we want… but we also have more debt. And when you have very little money at the end of the month anyway, what with bills and food and other expenses and debts, it is scary, not to mention a little frustrating, to see that much money go. So that’s been a bit of a niggling stressor at play, which makes for restless sleep at night and worry in the daytime.
And then there’s been a certain someone, who has had some minor issues. Suddenly, That Baby has FOUR TEETH. Holy hell. SO, that’s been fun. She has not complained hardly at all — the child is so good natured, she would not complain if her hair were on fire — but it has made for trouble sleeping, and that makes for a tired and slightly peevish baby in the daytimes, not to mention a tired and slightly peevish Mom and Dad. But also, the teething has changed her diet, which has made her constipated, which is no fun for anyone. So, although she is mostly cheerful and content, it’s still something that, as a parent, you worry about. “Is she drinking enough?” “Do we have any prunes?” “Come on baby, POOP FOR DADDY!!”
So THAT makes for weird days.
And then there is our elderly little cat. Opus had pancreatitis a few years back, and in cats, it is something that quite often just waxes and wanes for the rest of their lives. Sometimes there will be days when she is feeling poorly and in some discomfort, and yesterday was one of those days. She barfed, Exorcist-style, all over the playroom floor yesterday. I mean she booted in SPECTACULAR fashion. And that means that Stinkerbelle and I have had to relocate while the barfy carpet dries and I spray OxyClean stain remover everywhere and then clean up the mess. Now, that’s a pain in and of itself, because we have our daily routine and this has just made it go all pear-shaped. But now, I am worried about our kitty as well. It may just be that there’s a day or two of this and then she’s back to her old self. Or, it may not. I hate the thought that she’s feeling ill, and I hate that there is nothing I can do for her. But weighing on the back of my mind is not only the prospect that if she continues to feel poorly, we will have to take her to the vet and we really, truly can’t afford a lot of care for her. And weighing further still is the prospect that one of these days, our old girl is going to fall sick and will just be too old to recover. So that’s been a downer. Mind you, she’s been defying the odds, health-wise, since the age of 7 weeks, so I am not too concerned. A little maybe. Nobody every wants to say goodbye to their best pet friend.
So all these things have combined to make me feel a bit in a funk of late. I am tired and weary and peevish.
And also, you will note, not really good about the blogging every day.