Okey dokey, peeps: It’s HALLOWEEN again! And you know what that means… Me, LIVE BLOGGING as I run to and fro to the front door, and keep track of the number of little monsters… er, KIDS… that come by.
(What is it they say? “Back by popular demand”?? Okay, so maybe not. But meh… it’s fun for me.)
So here we go.
5:55 – BDH is feeding an increasingly crabby baby, while I get stuff set up in the foyer for the night. A rickety card table, a pumpkin, and two bowls of candy. MY KINGDOM FOR BLACK CONSTRUCTION PAPER!! I covered the table in a vinyl tablecloth which is all blue polka dots and stuff, so I turned it over to the white side. A couple of black spots for eyes and a smiley mouth, and we’d have ourselves a nice ghost. Oh well.
5:56 – If this kid goes to sleep before the trick-o-treaters come, I’ll be surprised. She and her dad are having a battle over the cereal right now, so we’ve gone beyond tired and right into FRANTIC.
6:09 – HA! A quick search around the house found a bit of black felt and TAAA-DAAAAH, our covered card table has become a friendly ghost. Okay, so it’s lame. Maybe it’s not the Halloween spectacle that The Mayor puts on each year, but then, we have, you know, LIVES and stuff. (Okay. I admit. He did a great job again this year. I love the guy lying in his driveway under the wheels of his car and surrounded by traffic cones. I can’t lie. It’s hilarious.)
6:12 – No kids yet. But it’s still light. Although I hear screeching outside, I’m guessing it’s the ne’er-do-well kids a couple doors up. Running around, unfed, unsupervised… of course.
6:14 – There’s an errant bumblebee walking around out there. I know. That was what I thought too.
6:18 – Last year we watched Hot Fuzz, which was just the right length — once it was done, we shut off the lights and locked up for the night. I think we’ll have to do that again. Because it’s… well… MORE FUN that way. Sure keeps us amused while we wait.
6:21 – Still no kids. Although the errant bumblebee has wandered off. It’s Halloween — that stuff happens. Too bad. He gave the night the surreal quality we look for in a Halloween. I mean, it’s not everyday bumblebees just wander by… well, not since I gave up the drinking, anyway.
6:25 – Duncan is in his perch in the front window, once again this year our little festive Walmart greeter. There are kids out there, but none on our side of the street yet — or we’d hear him peep.
6:28 – And Stinkerbelle is out like a light after her bottle. Which means the doorbell should ring any second now and jolt her wide awake.
6:30 – No kids yet. I hate waiting.
6:35 – Last year some university kids came by for their Halloween charity drive for the food bank (Trick-or-Eat or something like that), so I dashed downstairs and found a couple of cans of soup for them in case they show up again. We hate the soup so it was just sitting there. We unload the soup, the homeless get soup… everybody wins. Okay, so I am giving away reject food… does that make me a bad person?
6:41 – EIGHT kids just came by, including a crowd of angels which I KNOW are not angelic in the slightest. And one very small Maple Leaf without a bag. Or a parent, that I could see. (I think he’s the spawn of The Deputy Mayor. Which explains the lack of supervision.) I gave the kid a Tootsie Roll. He seemed happy.
6:47 – Another BUNCH of kids. Including an adorable Tigger — The Mayor’s Daughter. I have to say, The Mayor’s Wife was very sweet, offering to give us baby stuff, giving us lots of congratulations… it was nice.
6:51 – 3 homicidal maniacs came by. Betcha can’t say that just any night.
6:55 – A zombie princess! AND a zombie! All in one night! Dude. Maybe we should watch Shaun of the Dead.
6:59 – A very tired chicken just rejected the candy I offered. It’s late for chickens to be out, I think.
7:00 – Two Batmans and a Spiderman just opened the door and walked in. I LOVE that. And then they debated whether one of the Batmans was actually Spiderman.
7:01 – The happiest bat in the Universe and a Princess SO HAPPY she just danced across the porch just rang the doorbell and started hollering “Happy Halloween”… BEFORE I had even opened the door.
7:04 – Two little trick or treaters walked away before I could even give them candy. I am thinking they don’t get the drill. But one of them was Batman, and I’m up to my whatzis in superheroes tonight, so…
7:08 – A bunch of silly pre-teens just sang us Christmas Carols. I appreciate innovation. Another 3 came up and tried to say “Happy Halloween” in unison and failed miserably. So I shut the door and let them try it again.
7:11 – A TINY Joker, VERY much in character, came in and kept trying to grab my hand. “D’you wanna shake my hand?” He had a buzzer in his hand. I gave him some candy, he left, and as he was leaving he turned back and said “I have a BUZZER in my hand!” like he was fooling EVERYBODY. Best. Kid. EVAH.
7:15 – Lots and lots of princesses this year. And an adorable bumblebee named Charlotte. (Not the aforementioned wandering bumblebee, however. I think that might have been a neighbor.)
7:20 – WHOA. A crowd. I am running out of candy suddenly. 95 kids already. That’s crazy talk.
7:24 – Sir Richard of (I am assuming) Camelot just came. “Hi.” and then “Bye.” Sir Richard is not big on smalltalk.
7:27 – Duncan is NOT happy about the lack of kids.
7:30 – A recycling bin. COOL. And a half-angel, half-devil. These kids are getting creative.
7:31 – A hippie just told me “Peace out.” And his father did a “D’OH” down on the sidewalk. Not exactly the hippie ways he had taught the youngster, I am guessing.
7:36 – The world’s CUTEST fireman just came to the door with a glow stick on. Safety first.
7:37 – A little kangaroo, when prompted by a “What do you say?” by his mom down on the sidewalk, turned around, walked back, and hollered, “Trick or treat!” But he was as pleased as punch to get a lollipop despite the faux pas, so all’s well that ends well.
7:41 – Duncan sits in front of the door, staring at it, WILLING more kids to come. He loves to greet the kids. For his “tricks” he gets his own “treats” — cat cookies.
7:47 – Things are slowing down trick-or-treater-wise, but not out in the street — the place is jumpin’, man. All the families seem to be out.
7:51 – My doorknob turns, a panda walks in, announces “We want some candy”, and reaches for the candy bowl. There’s no predicting what a 3 year old hopped up on sugar will say.
7:55 – Looks like we might be coming to the end. BDH was just remarking how his favourite was the toasted marshmallow. I myself am always fond of the little ones with no social graces. The Undead were also a highlight. But I’ve had my fill of Batmans, thankyouverymuch.
8:00 – And as 8 o’clock approaches, we are closing up shop. We’ve had well over 100 kids — not as many as last year, but enough. And we are HUNGRY. So… That’s it from Halloween Central for another year here in Subdivisionland. HappyHalloween, all — and don’t eat all that candy all in one sitting.