Things About Cats That I Don’t Get

  1. Forgetting to pull one’s tongue all the way in.
  2. The whole closed-door issue.
  3. The ability to stop whatever they are doing instantly — to bathe. From a dead sleep? Gotta wash my arm. From a full-on run? Oops, dirty bum.
  4. Why it seems like effective security to chatter/cuss at birds through a closed window.
  5. Why it is imperative that they sleep/sit/lounge on whatever piece of paper is present.
  6. How they can lick their own butts, yet will turn up their noses at freshly dished-up cat food.
  7. How they came to believe they can move objects with the force of their mind i.e. “if I stare at that doorknob long enough, the door will open.” No, it won’t.
  8. Eating bugs.
  9. People as large mobile furniture.
  10. Sleeping with your chin on your shins. Dude. That’s gotta make for a stiff SOMETHING.
  11. How it’s possible to clean one’s entire face — and more — and yet still miss that giant drop of milk sitting on one’s chin.

3 thoughts on “Things About Cats That I Don’t Get

  1. hehe Too funny, I have a cat named Layah, and the paper thing is just too funny. An open notebook in her presence is torture for me, If I’m trying to work in it…At least she’s gotten over the fascination with my keyboard though.. However she still likes to get on my monitor and swing her tail in front of the screen, yeah i’m working with outdated electronics LOL

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